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Taco Files

Recent Posts

Sudden White Sangria (6/25/2015) - So I googled “sangria recipes” and the first ten hits were all completely different. Like, I don’t think they shared a single ingredient between the ten of them. They even recommended ten different varieties of wine.  Now, I know how to make sangria, I was just looking for ideas and confirmation of measurements and so […]
Mason Jar Taco Salad by Organize Yourself Skinny Lazy Salads for the Sunday Confessional (6/10/2015) - Perhaps you have heard of this marvelous invention called “mason jars”. They have apparently been around for a very long time—longer, in fact, than a certain class of hipster has been using them in lieu of booze glasses. I know, right? Who knew? Here I thought mason jars were that thing you could replace all your […]
Eat Your Beer in Pizza Dough (6/2/2015) - If you like pizza, have beer handy, and some time to plan ahead for a meal, I have the recipe for you. You use beer instead of water in pizza dough to add a hoppy, savory element that can take dough to a whole new level. I first saw this technique over at Baking Steel, […]
Cheese stuffed poblano peppers (5/28/2015) - What I have here is a bag of frozen roasted poblano peppers.  Because it is not pepper season. In my part of the country — Colorado, the southwest — chile season happens around Labor Day.  This is when the chile roaster comes to the farmers market and you can get fresh roasted peppers of just […]
Holy Calabaza Cake, Batman! (5/13/2015) - Shh. Come here. I’m going to share MY SECRET. This is the best cake I’ve ever had. And no matter how bad I am at decorating the cake, no one cares, because this cake is SO FREAKING GOOD. Because pumpkins, that’s why. Here we go. DELILAH’S AMAZING PUMPKIN CAKE BECAUSE OMG Ingredients: -1 package Funfetti […]
TACO TRUCK SHOWDOWN (5/11/2015) - A few weeks back I attended Seattle’s annual(?) TACO LIBRE TRUCK SHOWDOWN. This year featured almost 30 trucks, and an estimated 20,000 people showed up to sample the tasty treats on offer–Blah, blah, blah… let’s talk about the friggin TACOS! Due to long lines and menus that saw items being crossed out faster than Elon […]
The Celebration Launchatini! (5/6/2015) - You guys! YOU GUYS! My first novel came out yesterday and that calls for a celebration. And nothing says a celebration like inventing a fancy commemorative cocktail, right? Turns out this is, uh, easier said than done. Either that or I’m the most incompetent bartender of all time. Or maybe those novel debut nerves significantly […]
Cinco de Mayo Churro Waffles (5/5/2015) - I’m High Priestess of Churromancy, so let’s celebrate Cinco de Mayo right! Whip out some churro waffles! May is a big month for me. My prequel Clockwork Dagger story “The Deepest Poison” just came out (99 cents everywhere *hackcough*), later this month is Phoenix Comicon with its Holy Taco Church Revival (Halleluiah! Pass the Guac!), […]
Notta Taco: Red Beans and Rice (4/29/2015) - Hi folks! I know, this is the Holy Taco Church, and I keep posting things that are Notta Taco. But I have to share the recipe I always use for Red Beans and Sausage, because it is glorious. Our holiest of holies, the Tacopope himself, would undoubtedly revel in this dish, and bless me for […]
Tell Me Your Nacho Secrets. TELL ME. (4/23/2015) - I like nachos even more than I like tacos. Nachos are for sharing. They’re for parties. There are no recipes for nachos — you just put a bunch of things you like on top of tortilla chips. It’s great.  It’s like actual food for people who don’t cook. Nachos are one of my favorite writer-at-home […]
HAWKAMOLE: How to Have Your Guac and Eat It, Too by Delilah S. Dawson (4/15/2015) - On book launch day, I need two things: CUPCAKES AND BOOZE. And you know what goes well with both of those items? My new book, HIT. No, wait. I mean… GUACAMOLE. But I don’t want to walk two miles in the rain to get it, so I made it myself. Mind you, this is my […]
Poach it, Hash It, Eat It (4/15/2015) - When I’m not being an international woman of mystery or writing books about junkie wizards, I’m a family lady who’s constantly worrying about what to make for dinner. On Sunday, for example, my son got home from a campout and my husband had a hockey game and I had a deadline, so I needed something […]
The very best taco Seattle has to offer (4/13/2015) - It took me a while–a bit over a year, in fact–but I finally found a truly great taco in Seattle.   But first you need some background.  Back in June of ’14, Kevin Hearne invited a bunch of us authors to visit The Taco Guild in Phoenix, AZ during Phoenix Comicon.  Now I consider myself […]
Bacon Fat Chocolate Chip Cookies. Yes, Really. (4/7/2015) - Did the title of this post cause you to recoil in horror? Or did you start to drool? Bacon and chocolate works surprisingly well. I’ve actually made chocolate-covered bacon toffee before (aka BACON CRACK). Here, the combo plays well together in cookie form. The addition of the bacon fat infuses dough with flavor. It’s really […]
Healthy* Chicken Chimichangas! (4/6/2015) - Here is what scares me about chimichangas: They’re deep-fried burritos. Burritos are not normally a lightweight meal to begin with, but deep frying them seems like you’re giving your heart a big ol’ middle finger. Kind of like deep-fried butter sticks at the county fair or deep-fried anything, really. So we’re going to tone things […]
April Fools Confessional: Karina Cooper (4/1/2015) - Forgive me, Our Lady of Margaritas, for I have sinned… It has been [uncontrollable coughing fit] days since my last confession. You see, I have something of an income, now. My very own income. And it’s kind of amazing, except… except I understand that as Taco Templar of the Holy Guacamole, it is very much my […]
April Fools Day Confessional: Jaye Wells (4/1/2015) - Forgive me, Tacolytes, for I have sinned. When I was just a novitiate, I stole the sacred habanero once used by St. Scoville of Antioch from the sepulcher of the Taco Pope. Each year under the dark of a new moon, I eat a single seed from the infernal pepper and commune with my dark […]
April Fool’s Day Confessional: Delilah S. Dawson (4/1/2015) - I’ve been hiding this under my fedora for a long time, but… I’m really a dude. A dude named Dick Manly. I only write under a lady’s name because women typically sell better and get more attention as writers. You can’t imagine how much money I waste on shaving products and false eyelashes for events. […]
April Fool’s Confessional: Jason M. Hough (4/1/2015) - Who me? Sinned? Please. Well…. there’s was that one time… This was forty years ago, mind you, and I’d just completed my expedition to the South Pole wearing nothing but a sombrero and a full compliment of arctic gear. Anyway, as our party hiked back to base camp in Boise, Idaho, I found myself behind Delilah […]
April Fool’s Day Confessional: Nicole Peeler (4/1/2015) - Forgive me, Tacopope, for I have sinned. Repeatedly and often. It’s just that on the way to work there’s this place. I know it’s a bad place. I know I shouldn’t go there. I know I shouldn’t love it so much…but I do. Sometimes I find myself there. I pull up…and next thing I know […]

Church Authors

About

Writing books is hungry work—ask any author who needs to eat. And in the middle of a 5K-word sprint you can get such a hankering for tacos and margaritas that it becomes a religious experience. Revelations can occur. Passages of holy writ just happen. Like this one from the Taco Bible:

from The Taco Bible, Book of Ingredients

 

Screen Shot 2014-04-18 at 6.35.27 PM

FAQs

 Are you a real church?

We are not a church in the tax-exempt sense; we don’t have a choir, organist, or a guilt trip to lay on you, and our altar is the local taco stand. But we are a fellowship of authors who like to get together and talk about stuff we love—in this case, food, drink, and books.

If I join your church will I get in trouble with the one I’m already in?

We really doubt it. For one thing, we’re not going to tell anybody. For another, the Tacolord and Margarita of the Salted Rim don’t require your faith or your worship—they are going to do their thing regardless—so you don’t have to worry about making your current god(s) jealous.

What does the Holy Taco Church think of LGBT marriage?

We hope we’re invited to the wedding and there will be tacos and margaritas at the reception. And churro cupcakes with candied bacon on top. Aww yeah. Because love is rad, people, and we’re all in the same tortilla together.

What is your stance on burritos/tapas/enchiladas/churros/beer/anything else at all? Aren’t they superior foods/beverages?

We like them very much and consume them often. We are not the sort of people to say ours is the one true way or pick a fight over what tastes best. We think you should put whatever you want in your taco, you know? The only thing we fight about is whose turn it is to be the designated driver. Because we ALWAYS need a designated driver even though we all want tasty beverages. Seriously, friends: You gotta be responsible when chilling with Lady Margarita.

How does the Holy Taco Church believe the world was created?

Fuck if we know, we weren’t there. But we’re here now and it’s Taco Tuesday! Or it will be in 1-6 days! We’re going out for the cochinita pibil.

 

 

 

 

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Sermons

  • Fill Your Taco With Love

    Here in the Holy Taco Church we are fond of looking at our lives like a taco. When the teeth of the Tacolord crunch down and he eats you (as he eats everything in the universe), will your taco—that is to say, your life— be delicious? How can you make sure that it is? There’s an easy […]

    May 24, 2014 by: